Three Layers of Anxiety and How to Treat Them Like an Itchy Bug Bite
Anxiety attacks and panic are hard enough to experience without adding our own scary story and interpretation of what the anxiety could mean. Aida Beco, an ACT Therapist, talks about three layers of suffering that we commonly experience with our anxious thoughts and anxiety attacks. The goal is to stay at layer one and learn how to peel back layers two and three, which ultimately make anxiety feel more intense.
Regnier Restorative Counseling offers panic attack and anxiety treatment in Reston, VA and virtually.
Disclaimer: The content discussed here is geared towards individuals struggling with an irrational fear or a phobia of discomfort that comes with panic and anxiety, leading to avoidance that alters their lifestyle in an extreme manner. This content is not about minimizing the effects of anxiety. In no way is this content a blanket statement for all anxiety and panic attacks. Please seek out support with a licensed therapist, whether that be Kate or another clinician to receive one on one support and an individualized treatment plan.
More: What Not to Do When Practicing Exposures
Layer 1: The feeling, thought or sensation
The first layer is the feeling, thought or sensation that feels uncomfortable and brings on anxiety or panic. This could be what if thoughts, a racing heart, spiraling thoughts, a stomach ache, a heavy feeling of dread, dizziness, etc.
Layer 2: Making meaning and the interpretation
Layer two is when we make meaning out of what we’re experiencing in layer one. We decide the sensation, thought or feeling is dangerous or too uncomfortable to feel. We create a big danger story and attach it to these anxious sensations. We also begin thinking very catastrophic and black & white, such as “I’m going to feel this way forever” or “I’m stuck this way”. This type of thinking can also be called “forevering”. We start forevering ourselves into a state of doom.
Layer 3: Attempting control and failing
Layer three is when we try to control and get rid of or minimize the original feeling from layer one, because in layer two we decided it was dangerous. The feeling from layer one can’t be escaped, but we try to control it anyways and inevitably fail. Then we decide we’re failures and something is wrong or not working.
We may always naturally have the sensations, thoughts and feelings of layer one. These aren’t the problem. The problem starts when we wander into layer two and three, deciding the feelings from layer one are bad and we must try to control them or make ourselves feel different and better. The issue is we can’t. It’s impossible to get rid of the original anxiety by forcing it away. We may be able to numb it or avoid it but not for long and this leads to staying stuck in the cycle of being afraid to feel our anxiety. When we strip back layers two and three, we are left with the unpleasant feelings and sensations which is why it's so easy to be tricked into thinking we must add on layers two and three. But this is a trap that only makes the experiences in layers one feel so much worse.
Examples
Example One- Travel/Flying
If you get anxious when traveling or flying, think about the experiences you’d have in layer one, the story you attach to it, and the attempts to control it.
Layer one may look like an upset nervous stomach, a sense of dread, feeling stuck, or fearing you’ll have a panic attack on the plane.
Layer two would be the story and interpretation you give these sensations and thoughts. You may think these feelings and thoughts are too big and scary to feel. They mean you shouldn’t get on the plane or won’t be able to handle it. You might go crazy and if you have an anxiety attack then you’ll feel that way forever and never recover.
Layer three is what you decide to do with these feelings and typically we try to control them, reassure them, or make them go away. You may bring extra things to do on the plane to try and distract yourself, or have multiple mediations downloaded to listen to. You might try to think about how statistically safe it is to fly so therefore you shouldn’t feel so anxious. Or you might not eat all day in case your stomach gets upset or bring your sour candy and stress relief ball just in case you get too anxious mid flight. You may decide to take the avoidance route and cancel the trip completely.
There’s nothing wrong with using some of these techniques for self soothing. But it’s easy to get stuck in the cycle of thinking that we must rely on these techniques to “feel better” or otherwise we won’t be able to handle it. Using these techniques to try and “get rid of” the anxiety tends to also backfire and make the anxiety from layer one feel worse. Read more about that here.
Example Two: Bug bite
Here’s an example of how we would rather treat the anxiety we may experience with travel and flying. Imagine you’ve discovered a bug bite and it itches.
Layer one is the itching. It's annoying and distracting.
Layer two is what we think the itching means. Logically, we know it’s just a bug bite but doesn’t need any extra attention unless it looks infected.
Layer three is what we do about the bug bite. The only thing we can do is put on some itch cream and maybe wear bug spray or wear longer layers outside next time. Or we do nothing at all and wait for it to pass.
And that's it. There’s no catastrophic thinking about what could be happening because of the bite or that it means it will get infected and we'll get really sick. We don’t decide to stay indoors from now on and never leave our house to make sure we don’t get a bug bite ever again.
This is how we want to treat the sensations and feelings from layer one in the first example.
The problem isn’t the anxiety, it's how we treat it and what we decide to do about it. The bug bite would become a problem emotionally and mentally if we decided the itching was dangerous and we needed to alter our lives in such an extreme way to make sure we never get an itchy bug bite again.
We don’t like the itchy bug bite and we don’t like the sensations when traveling/flying, but both are safe to feel.
If there is something you can actually do to relieve discomfort, then feel free to do it! Use itch cream, take medication for the headache or stomach ache, etc. But we can’t do anything about what ifs and how they make us feel. So instead, we let them be and feel what’s there, because it's safe and doesn’t need to be pushed away. Trying to push it away typically makes it worse.
Therapy with Anxiety Attack Specialist Kate Regnier in Reston, VA
Kate is a licensed therapist who specializes in treating panic attacks and anxiety. Kate uses evidence-based modalities such as CBT, ACT, and EMDR. She offers virtual therapy sessions and works with clients who are located in Virginia, Washington DC, Maryland, Indiana & Michigan. Kate also uses psychoeducation with clients, helping them keep in mind there is no magical quick fix to anxiety or panic attacks and recovery lies in the practice of allowing and feeling the anxious thoughts and feelings versus trying to get rid of them.
Click here to schedule a consultation with Kate or click here to learn more about her practice.
Disclaimer* The content provided in this blog is intended for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy or medical advice. While I strive to ensure the accuracy of the information shared, I cannot guarantee that all information is current or correct. Readers are advised to consult with a qualified healthcare professional before making any decisions based on this post.
